Helping kids calm down: Building an emotional toolbox in nature.

Big feelings don’t come with instructions.

For many young people we work with emotions arrive fast, loud and often without warning. Telling a child to calm down rarely helps especially for kids with trauma histories, neurodivergence or anxiety. What does help, is working with them to develop tools they can use when their body starts to feel overwhelmed.

At My Summit ABTS we spend a lot of time outdoors with kids walking setting noticing moving. Through our Walk and Talk sessions and camps we’ve seen that nature is one of the best places to build an emotional toolbox that actually gets used.

The emotional toolbox built outside.

One activity we often do with kids is creating an emotional toolbox of strategies they can carry with them. Nature gives us ready-made tools that are simple sensory and easy to remember. Here are a few favourites that regularly come out on walk and talks and camps.

The leaf – breathing. We use a leaf to slow things down. Kids Trace the edge of the leaf with their finger, breathing in and out as they move around the shape of the leaf. It gives their hands something to do while their breath settles and can shift attention away from the spiral of thoughts.

The stone- stomping or grounding. When feelings are stuck in the body, we don’t always try to talk them out. We stomp feet into the ground, press the stone into our hands, or feel it’s weight. It’s about reminding the body that it’s here, now, and supported.

Running cold water or ice cubes – for cooling down. Cold water or ice can be great for sensory regulation. Cooling sensations can help bring the nervous system down when emotions are running hot. Running your wrists under a cold tap helps as well as filling a sink with ice cubes, and dunking your head or wrists in really helps

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Movement and space

On camp we use the beach and open spaces to move energy out ...walking fast, walking slow,, climbing digging, running, splashing or simply lying in the sand. Regulation often comes after movement not before.

Over time kids start to use their own tools -that’s the goal, not adult stepping into fix things but kids learning what helps their body feel safe again.

Why nature helps so much.

Nature lowers the stakes. There’s less eye contact, fewer demands and no pressure to explain everything with words. Kids often talk more freely while walking side-by-side or fiddling with something in their hands, and when they don’t want to talk- that’s okay too. The regulation can still happen. We see this again and again; kids who struggle indoors often settle faster outside.

Take home tips for parents and carers.

You don’t need special equipment or perfect conditions. Here are a few simple ways to build an emotional toolbox at home;

1. Create a small nature kit. A leaf stone shell or stick in a pocket or bag can be enough. Let your child choose what feels right to them.

2. Practice tools when your kid is Calm. Breathing, grounding and movement works best when they’re familiar. Try them during calm moments so they’re easier to use when things get hard.

3. Focus on the body first not the behaviour. When emotions are high thinking brains are off-line. Help the body settle before trying to talk things through.

4. Use less words not more. Simple clear language and calm presence often do more than explanations or questions.

5. Remember that regulation comes before reflection. Problem-solving can wait -safety and calm come first.

At My summit ABS we don’t aim to stop big feelings. We help kids learn how to move through them. Nature gives a space tools and moments of calm that feel achievable even on hard days. Sometimes all it takes is a leaf, a stone and someone walking alongside you .